Your Weekly Horoscope

by Dr. Drake Mandible

Aries (March 21-April 19)

You may have noticed that everyone is talking about Uranus. It might be time to go on that diet you have been putting off.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

Today should be an active day for you with lots of opportunities. Uranus is in a new house and that means that people will be looking at you.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Uranus is going to cause you concern today. Who knows what might come out of that? Expect the unexpected.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

It is all about balance and flow. Since Uranus is acting up, probably more about flow this week.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

Let me be the first to issue you condolences. Uranus is going to make things difficult so plan ahead and stay prepared.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

People have always noticed when you enter a room. Now with the Uranus the way it is, even more people are going to notice.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Lots of things you normally get to ignore will be exerting their influence and causing noise this week. Uranus is just one of those things.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

It is getting hard to keep juggling all the secrets and lies. Everyone is suspecting you, and Uranus is going to cause even more people to suspect you might have done what you have been secretly been doing all along.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

With Uranus in a new house, you might want to consider getting some new clothing. Something loose fitting with lots of drape might really help you maintain your bright appearance.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

People admire you now. You may not realize how many admire you, because they are not showing the smiles and admiration in an obvious way. Uranus is making that possible.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

It always seems like you are singled out for argument and trouble. Right now you might wish that Uranus wasn’t where it is.

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

You have a large butt. No offense, I’m just telling you what the stars say.


If you were born this week, you probably can’t read this yet.

Before alteration this art was originated by AI (Midjourney)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *